S2 Episode 4: Meditation Special - Holiday Blues

Updated: Dec 15, 2020

The holidays, they always hit you back to back. Whether we see families on the timeline or festive decoration along an entire street in a neighborhood. The holidays hit when they come and there is no denying that.


Whether you lost a love or aren't able to be with the people you love for circumstances that can not be changed, it can be hard to navigate in this space and we wanted to shed light on that.


The holidays, whether it be Thanksgiving, Christmas, Kwanzaa or New Years, can bring you too feel the need to unite. It can bring up your grief even when we think we have it bay. Grief is a natural psychological-emotional response to loss, and we cannot stress enough that loss is not synonymous with death.


Since grief has no real timeline and is extremely subjective, we wanted to give you some tips if grief has shown up at your doorstep.


First things first, PREPARE YOURSELF. Acknowledge that the holidays will be different and they will be tough. Acceptance isn't always an easy pill to swallow, it help get you through to face it head on. It's also important to decide which traditions you want to keep. Sometimes it may help to make your own traditions. That can included, deciding where you want to spend the holidays – you may want to switch up the location, or it may be of comfort to keep it the same. Either way, make a conscious decision about location. Another thing that will help is to be honest. Tell people what you DO want to do for the holidays and what you DON’T want to do. Remember boundaries are always key especially around the holidays.


It's important to note that the holidays can bring about a wide range of emotions. You might feel joy, guilt, and sadness all within a few minutes. Allow yourself to feel those emotions without judging yourself or thinking you should be happy or you shouldn't be laughing. Don’t feel guilty about skipping events if you’re experiencing holiday overload! If you have lost a loved one, light a candle for your them or make their favorite dish. Anything that will help you feel close to them.


This weeks self-work (homework) assignment:

Allow yourself to imagine that grief is a person whom you can look in the eye. Write a letter to grief. Explain what grief has taken from you and the effects it is having on you. Be sure to jot down any emotions that you’re feeling in that moment or that you may have felt in the moment you experienced your loss. Reflect on where you feel you are right now in your grieving process. When you’re done, re-read it and then discard it.


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Listen on iTunes:

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-black-new-york/id1457506638?i=1000460717259

Listen on Soundcloud:

https://soundcloud.com/theblacknewyork/episode-4-1225-dealing-with-family-and-holiday-grieving

Listen on Spotify:

https://open.spotify.com/episode/3xmkt1R91jHMZYgtwpT5KQ

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